The Compassionate Friends-Baltimore Chapter
Butterfly Angels


The Compassionate Friends
Greater Baltimore Chapter

Butterfly Angels
Hope, Health, Healing after the Death of a Child
"No matter their age ... No matter the cause"
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Offerings From The Heart

Written by bereaved parents and family members, the following are offered with hope for the grieving heart.

David L. Murphy
2.1.93 -7.13.09

Thought of you with love today, but that is nothing new.
I thought of you yesterday, and the days before that too.
I think of you in silence, I often speak your name.
All I have are memories and some pictures in a frame.
Your memory is a keepsake, with which I'll never part.
    God has you in his keeping;
       I have you forever in my heart.

May 3, 2010
Missing you! by Randy Murphy (father)

Empty Arms

I wanted so badly to see your smile.
To hold your tiny, perfect little hands,
To guide you through your journey
Into the loving world I had prepared for you.
But now, all I have are the memories that might have been.

Source: unknown

Grief Warriors trudging their own road to Happy Destiny
Soul paths colliding in mid pain
Life plans fractured by loss
Mending in the fusion of sorrows shared.

Source: Barbie and Tommy s mom

1996: The Shattering

Urgent, wailing, shrieking
Bad news for someone
Scream past the happy man
Filling up at the gas station
On his way home from work
To be ready for tomorrow
They stop in front of his house
Life is forever divided
Into Before and After.

Source: Elizabeth Bishai

I don't want this life after death life... I want no parts of Grief.
I don't want this new staring down the night... I want the old easy peaceful slumber.
I don't want this new broiling anger... I want the old even temper.
I don't want this new empty lost feeling... I want the old sure footing.
I don't want this new listening to music to muffle my thoughts... I want the old unplugged awareness.
I don't want this new estranged person living in my body... I want the old connected person I used to be.
I don't want this new unfettered schedule... I want the old familiar routine.
I don't want this new depth of emotions... I want the old false sense of security.
I don't want this new need to understand... I want the old ignorant acceptance.
I don't want this new road map... I want the old place of knowing.
I don't want these new people in my life... I want my children back in their places where they were before death took them away.

Source: Frannie & Suzanne's Mom

Sometimes love is for a moment

Sometimes love is for a lifetime

Sometimes a moment is a lifetime

The Cross

I was trying to keep my heart open to life. Afraid to be alone, I agreed to spend the day with Ruth and her daughter, Sarah, a young girl with CP and a tremendous amount of courage. We went to a camp in the country sponsored by Young Life.

The campers assembled in the barn for morning worship. They were ready to start their day with songs of Praise. I kept my darkest glasses on to hide the heartache I felt over the fact my children with special needs, Barbie and Tommy, could not be there. They had both met a special need in me, to love, to improve the quality of my life by making a difference in their lives. But they had both died unexpectedly within a week of each other. I was so lost, I had no footing.

Grief overwhelming, I turned to flee the joyful sounds of children still living. Crying out to God to please deliver me from this unceasing sorrow. I walked, sobbing uncontrollably, following a single lane which wound its way past the cornfields and into the woods. I wondered how far I would have to go to get away from the pain I carried within me. My head was so heavy I could not lift it, but I could feel the coolness of the trees, and I could see the shading on the road at my feet.

I needed a place to rest in my weariness and thought at least I might find a log to sit on. But to find a log I would have to leave the road. Certainly there must be a trail into the woods, I thought, as I veered off to the right, brushing branches away from my face. There WAS a path, not well traveled, but with enough hope for me to follow it deeper into the woods. I came upon a bench, not just a log, but a bench which I reached with relief, covering my face with my hands to catch the tears.

Guided unaware, I looked up to see that I was sitting in a clearing, facing a large wooden Cross, planted firm among the trees. God's arms outstretched. "Lay your burdens down, Lay your burdens down." I lay my whole body down, with MY arms outstretched, to feel the whole earth beneath me. And to feel the full warmth of God's Love in the light of the sun that shone down from the Cross rising above me. I cried until I could cry no more. I lay there until I could take in the life breath of God whispering through the trees. I lay there in the stillness of my exhaustion until I could feel His presence.

Thank you God for leading me through my desperation to a place of healing. It is a spiritual experience I must revisit from time to time in this grief overwhelming.

Source: Carol Bozman, July 2004

Remember Them

In the rising of the sun and its going down,
We Remember Them

In the blowing of the wind and in the chill of winter,
We Remember Them

In the blueness of the sky and in the warmth of the summer,
We Remember Them

In the rustling of the leaves and in the beauty of autumn.
We Remember Them

In the beginning of the year and when it ends,
We Remember Them

When we are lost and sick at heart,
We Remember Them

When we have joys we yearn to share,
We Remember Them

So long as we live, they too shall live, for they are now a part of us,
as We Remember Them

Source: Unknown

Greater Baltimore Chapter of The Compassionate Friends
520 Priestford Rd.
Churchville, MD 21028
Email: info@BaltimoreTCF.com
Phone #: 410-560-3358

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